Do you think of limits as putting a brake on your freedom? Consider speed limits. Does driving the speed limit make you less free? You are free to disregard those laws at the risk of being fined or jailed. And we sometimes forget that we did make an agreement to obey the law when we applied for a license to drive!
Since I received a speeding ticket recently I’ve been thinking about how to use limitations to benefit peace of mind, awareness, and fulfillment.
I made a simple adjustment in my thinking about limitation. It moved from being a restriction to an advantage. Speed limits allow me to relax behind the wheel and go with the flow. It’s a shift in focus from, “Oh, why not, everyone else is doing it.” to “What will this action produce?” Instead of anxiety or regret after the fact, conscious limitation allows less stress, improved performance, and a life worth living. Read more...
Howard Behar, one of the founding fathers of Starbucks used to visit our offices at Illuminations, and his passion for developing people was always inspiring. One time he said, inspect what you expect, and that simple statement has stuck with me all these years later.
Inspection means to look at something closely so you can discover what works and just as importantly, what doesn’t, before it’s too late to make a change or self correct to the standard that you expect!
You have to set an explicit expectation, standard, or level of quality you want to achieve, and have a strong belief that it will happen. Unexpressed expectations are hopes and edge towards fantasy.
Instead of hoping expectations are met:
o Make known your expectation to yourself and others
o Put forward all your best effort to make it happen
o Run it through the highest good test
o Measure the results Read more...
OK … OK, I know it’s also a state of your pocket book, but, and I’m using the BIG BUT
here, it starts with a state of mind that says:
I am effective
I am resourceful
I am open to receive
I know people who are abundant in their financial resources and poor in their relationships. I also know some who are rich in their relationships and poor in confidence, and others who are rich in confidence and poor in results.
Abundance covers the spectrum of your consciousness. When abundance is activated, these states of mind: effectiveness, resourcefulness, and openness to receive, reveal whatever areas need to be addressed in your life now. Read more...
I wrote last year about considering a third possibility when you get into a situation that is accelerating to an either/or scenario … either my way or the highway, giving in or giving up, being passive or being confrontational. When faced with two not so great alternatives, it’s good to practice coming up with a third possibility to pull you and others out of taking positions that could end up in a polarizing situation.
I’m writing about it this week, because I continue to see that using this simple process of accessing a third possibility gives you the power of AND, a natural antidote to the divisive force of EITHER/OR. I’m playing with words here, but there is a force behind words and blame is often in the background of either/or, no matter how nice you are in the process. You may grumble in private instead of pontificating in public, but the result is the same. When you get beyond the notion that you’re either with me or against me, then you can disagree AND still be friends. Read more...
I’ve been reading a lot of Eckhart Tolle lately. The questions he poses give me great pause and in this case, a topic for this week’s Uplifting Moment. Eckhart asks, “Why would you hold on to a thought of resentment? Why would you have your mind produce such thoughts?” These are great riddles to ponder, because when faced with a question like that, vs. “why are your thoughts full of resentment” you begin to see YOU as the creator instead of your circumstances.
Resentment prevents countless relationships from developing any kind of bond or good will, or even an allowance for something to be as it is. When you get rid of thoughts of resentment, you can be with what happened, and perhaps even allow what was previously unknown to be revealed.
Then it becomes self-evident that the person, circumstance, or condition didn’t cause the resentment — your mind did. Read more...