Monthly Archives: January 2012

Replace A Sharp Tongue With A Sharp Mind

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um-013112-emailI heard a customer complaint this week about being treated rudely.

I was able to resolve the complaint quickly and did so.

What was left was to penetrate the rudeness so it wouldn’t happen again.

We’ve all been rude from time to time, knowingly and unknowingly.

The person accused of being rude told me the following:

  1. “I recognize what I said and did.”
  2. “I’m sorry. I know I am judgmental.”
  3. “I’m working on it.”

Her conclusion was to practice an admonishment she read in the Bible that said to guard against a sharp tongue.

That saying stayed with me all day. I pictured her sharp tongue surrounded and guarded by the word police.

And I knew that wouldn’t do the trick, because as soon as the word police were lulled to sleep in the everyday living of speaking and listening, agreement and conflict, reaction and resistance, the causes of the sharp tongue would play out again in rudeness.

Fantastic!

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um-012412-emailThere is no one like your partner in life to tell you when you repeat certain words.

You know the words. They don’t surprise anyone. Nothing new is being added or said. It’s just filler, mortaring sentences together like mud and bricks.

I didn’t realize how much I used the words “great” and “absolutely” and “fantastic” until my husband asked me what happened that was so “absolutely fantastic” as I hung up the phone one day.

My explanation didn’t fulfill the amazement expressed in my words and tone. If something is fantastic it has to be:

Sensational.

Outstanding.

Dazzling.

First rate.

Stunning.

Breathtaking.

Delicious.

Mind-blowing.

And not just interesting.

So I’ve taken a moratorium on the word fantastic to see if I can move from being automatic in my conversations to being present to create in words my true meaning.

Love Is The Correction

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um-011712-emailWhat if …

Just this week …

No matter what problem you’re facing …

You make love the correction.

What would be healed?

How would it impact your behavior?

I had this insight sitting with a group of people singing!

We had connected with an old friend from 30 years ago. She has a group that sings together in a monthly SatSONG. One of the lines of a sing-a-long said to make love the correction or it’s what I thought I heard!

I couldn’t get the line out of my mind. I started spinning out how different my conversations would be if love were the core correction I made when I faced an uncomfortable, challenging, impossible situation.

Change Your Model, Change Your Results

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um-011012-emailI love a new year!

In addition to the opportunities every New Year brings, you’re inclined to look at the results of the previous year. In business it’s automatic this time of year, and of paramount importance to do so.

In life … not so much!

It strikes me funny that in business we make instantaneous corrections once we see results aren’t working, but in life we often lag behind making a change.

The last two weeks have been hell for me crunching numbers, working schedules, reducing hours, and making substantial changes that will improve results immediately at work.

In the midst of it all I realized that the old business model we were working from was no longer useful. I didn’t see it until a close advocate kept questioning the results. Then we started to look and found the holes.

What To Do When The Well Runs Dry

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um-010312-emailDo you know what it feels like when your well runs dry? Not the one in the back yard. I’m talking about the one you draw from when you need to refresh your spirit.

If you’ve lowered the bucket often enough and still find it coming up dry, you may want to ask yourself some new questions.

First, ask if you’ve been here before. If the answer is yes, then ask if you got through it. Of course you did. You wouldn’t be here if you hadn’t!

There have been peaks and valleys, but not just valleys. How did you get out of the valley? You kept moving forward.

Second, ask if you’re looking in the same place for something new. If you are still looking for change, new beginnings, or a different outcome—in the same way, with the same tools, or in the same old locations—maybe you need to dig a new well.