A savvy young manager was telling me that his colleague was starting to speak in a CYA kind of mode. Then he hesitated and asked me, “Do you know what CYA means?” I laughed saying, “Cover your ass!”
Relieved to know I knew what he was talking about, he went on to tell me that he asked his colleague why he didn’t just tell the truth.
I stopped laughing, and thought that indeed, the best strategy is to tell the truth.
You tell the truth because those listening can:
- Understand the problem
- Look into what’s possible
- Support you in making a decision
- Fit what happened into a larger context
- Tell you what they’re thinking that you didn’t already know
- Count on you for reliable information
And yes, they might get irritated too! But it’s like ripping off the Band-Aid. Get it over with. Read more...
Think of someone you judge as negative. You see them coming, you groan, and steel yourself against the onslaught you know is coming whether it’s directed at you or others.
I’m here to remind you to relax and take a breath. You don’t have control over other people.
You can complain about them, but what does that bring you?
- Commiseration from friends
- Advise from colleagues
- “Don’t take it personally!” from well meaning associates
- An entrenched judgment that change isn’t possible
Then there’s the negativity you direct towards yourself. Your own stinking thinking that consists of not measuring up.
There is a remedy! And it’s not hard; it just takes focus and practice.
First understand what negativity means to you when you use it to complain about another person or yourself. You may be using it as a catchword to describe what might be better reported as: Read more...