I mediated a conflict the other day and dropped easily into a field of awareness that has come with 35 years of practice. I wasn’t there to solve the problem; I was there to allow balance in the relationships so solutions could emerge.
Someone noted how easy it was for me to see what was going on for people. For me there was only energy present and I could ride the energy like a wave and bring what was real present. It’s a practice born out of not being attached to a particular outcome and instead holding the highest good in mind.
A skill that seems easy to others often reveals a commitment to practice.
What can practice teach us about happiness? Read more...
I live in a modern 5-story Santa Monica building with my husband. All the conveniences of a security building with in-apartment washers and dryers, a refrigerator with filtered water spouts and ice, both crushed and cubed. Key fobs and codes to get into the entrance or the underground parking. I walk out the front door and am running down the road watching the sun come up over Santa Monica Boulevard.
I loved it until the new tenants moved in one floor above us.
The people above us are heavy walkers. Did I say heavy, I mean stompers!
At first it was just plain annoying and then became disturbing. In accordance with my views on complaining, I immediately turned my complaint into a request of our landlord. A wonderful and sympathetic lady who nodded her head and said she understood our dilemma and would ask the folks upstairs to be cognizant of their footfalls. Not much hope of a change when she also said it’s a common complaint and she hears the people above her as well. Read more...
Are You Listening?
Have you ever had a conversation with someone who responded in a way that suggested they heard something different from what you actually said? Some might call this a miscommunication — Nicole Mercolino, an intuitive coach, calls this “selective listening”. She told me:
“You know you’re speaking with someone who has selective listening when blame or excuses seem to be the name of the game. When I present Active vs. Selective Listening as a key aspect to successful communication, I often find the initial response is a quizzical look, followed by:
What do you mean by Active vs. Selective Listening? I hear what you’re saying… doesn’t that mean I’m listening?
No, actually, it doesn’t. Active Listening requires that you shut off your internal voice that is trying to hastily figure out how to respond. Why do you have to figure out how to respond before you respond? Here are the usual suspects that identify when you stopped listening. You’re not listening because you’re more concerned with: Read more...